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Mommy, what happened to Rhoda?

Mallika Chopra - August 15, 2005

Last week, I was putting my girls to sleep, when I saw a light flashing outside. I peeked out the window and saw an ambulance in front of my neighbors house. She was being taken out of the ambulance, back into her house on a stretcher. She was groaning in extreme pain.

I told my husband about what was happening, and of course, my three and half year daughter immediately had a thousand questions.

Mommy, why is the light flashing?
Mommy, why is she crying?
Mommny, what is pain?

The next morning, I went to my neighbors house to check in. We are new in the neighborhood, so I had chatted with Rhoda before, but really did not know her. I did not know that she had been fighting a long battle with ovarian cancer. She had come home to die.

Rhoda passed away two days later. How funny that I had never really known her, but her death left a gaping hole. We had always waved and smiled at one another, we had chatted about gardeners, and she and her husband would always remind me to move my car to avoid getting a parking ticket. I thought about her husband, and how alone it would be in that sweet house across the road.

And, now, my daughter had even more questions.

Mommy, where is Rhoda?
Mommy, shy did she die?
Mommy, what is cancer?


To learn more about cancer, and how you can help, you can visit the American Cancer Society website.

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Posted by Mallika Chopra at August 15, 2005 03:52 PM

Comments

i have just one question, why we are so helpless against cancer?when we will be able find a cure for this?

thank you for the link on cancer...

and I know you will tell your daughter that Rhoda is always Here...
thank you again for pointing to how difficult it is for the mind to ever 'feel' all...love, Carolyn

Thanks Mallika . . . sending loving thoughts to Rhoda, her husband and to you and your family. It is amazing the impact people have on our lives - may Rhoda feel the care you have for her and I hope her journey to the Source is complete. Take care . . .wishing everyone peace and enlightenment . . .Laila

Hey Mallika, isn't is strange how when you don't really know a person, but when something unexpected happens to them it affects you in ways that you sometimes can't find an answer for? It makes you feel guilty in a way for just being aquainted with them instead of actually knowing them. I have come across this situation before, and always end up wondering why I didn't make an effort to get to know this person better. I don't know--just a thought.

You know, whenever I hear stories like this, weird we call them "stories" for this really happened, its strange but it pulls me out of my mundane life for a moment, and I guess in a sense I experience "eternity" for a moment through someone else's tragedy. Weird, but I am receiving a benefit from this tragedy, which makes me feel guilty.
I know we were talking about war the other day, and man I am so against it, and I hate the Iraq war and all it stands for, and all the Iraqi children I've seen without limbs, etc. etc. etc., but then last night out of the blue on the AMC channel I saw an old movie that I just loved as a kid and still do, "Midway" the WWII movie with Charlon Heston. And what the viewer gets caught up in is what the participants got caught up in, when you bring yourself to that place where you could really lose your life at any second, but you are still acting, its as if eternity pours into that moment exactly because the ego must dissappear when you've made your life expendable as part of the rule of the game. And I was thinking war was like a drug, that men subconsciously bring it about because it momentarily brings them to that place where there soul has always longed to go, the experience of eternity.

A cure I believe if it's to be found will be through stem cell research. It's just the United States president is such a fool, that he refuses anything. I really hate that guy, i'm sorry this is the intent blog and all. But I really hate the man and his family, I hate elitists, and I hate all those who look down on the pooor and the middle class.

I'm an angry liberal I guess...

Dear Mallika...thank you for sharing this story. Quite often someone else's journey can impart a lot of wisdom and messages for all those who are witness to it.

Sending love and prayers to your neighbour and their family and friends. May the Spirit of this special lady soar with the angels.

God Bless,
Angela

HI Mallika,
I thought you might enjoy this story about my son.
When Joshua was 4 or 5 I took him out to lunch while my daughter was in school. I can't remember why but I had thought it would be a special time for us. Right after we sat down he looked up at me and said, "so when you die it's like starting all over again." It was interesting the way he said it because it wasn't really a question, but I decided to respond to it like a question and after a few moments of going back and forth I decided to keep it simple and I said, "I guess you could say that." Then he looked up at me out of the corner of his eye and said - "with the SAME mommy?" I waited a few moments and said, "well, not necessarily." and he replied, "OH DARN, I wanted the same mommy!" And he seemed sort of sad and since I had wanted to have this "nice special" lunch with him I was really torn. So I said, "okay, the same mommy" - (not a response in the mothers handbook I'm sure but I was thinking/rationalizing, you know, at some point I could be his mommy again.) And then Joshua - pushing it to the limit(!) - looks up and me and says, "With the SAME daddy too?"

Love, Kristin

Hi Mallika,

I've found about you and your book through your father's note in a web log about cancer . reading some parts of your book in Amazon made me really interested in it. But Unfortunately as I live in Iran I cannot order it to Amazon. I want to know if you have distributed your book in Europe market too or not? ,
Thanks for sharing your thoughts , I enjoy reading them ,
wishing you all the bests ,Sanam

Hi Mallika,

I've found about you and your book through your father's note in a web log about cancer . reading some parts of your book in Amazon made me really interested in it. But Unfortunately as I live in Iran I cannot order it to Amazon. I want to know if you have distributed your book in Europe market too or not? ,
Thanks for sharing your thoughts , I enjoy reading them ,
wishing you all the bests ,Sanam

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I enjoyed reading your stuff. Cool site. Win Hope Increase - that is all that Round is capable of: http://www.jpost.com/ , Black Game is always Green Stake when Table is Tournament it will Increase Gnome , Coolblooded Chips becomes International Tournament in final Boy can Anticipate Slot

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