you hit the nail right in the center rahul! i personally do put on and lose weight quite quickly... and it's not uncommon when i go back to india for two of my relatives to sit and discuss right in front of me whether i've lost or gained weight since last time they saw me...

once, i let the two of them berate the issue for ten minutes as i sipped on my whiskey. they discussed everything from how loose my shirt was to the bone structure around my chin and the thickness of my fingers like i was a art project. i finally interjected to save them both and to move the conversation along.

i reminded them one of them saw me after a two week vacation when i had gained a lot of weight and the other saw me six months earlier in the middle of my basketball season when i was in great shape!

of course, the final verdict everyone agreed on... lose 10 more pounds!

this whole subject reminds me of this friend of mine i met after a while (which took place outside of the subcontinent) who made this comment about how i had gained weight in a matter of months.Mind you that was even before she'd asked about my well-being and soforth.I was extremely taken aback .Guess when you live abroad you expect the same gesture in manners and customs from people even from your own culture.

again very nicely written Rahul.
take care.

Well written Rahul . . .I am surprised this hasnt been the subject of a BBC comedy as yet. Thanks for sharing the ideosyncrasies that make all cultures unique in their special way . . . keep smiling!!

Laila

just read your write up on weighty issues-hilarious!
I still remember my aunt plying my newly wed and now
weighty cousin with mithai on her trip to
India..cousin had put on weight gorging herself on
chocolates and coke..and since she had been married
for about 6 months aunt had erroneously presumed she
was pregnant,(after all like kalidas ki shakuntala all
our women, on and off the screen get pregnant on their
wedding night!) but was trying to be discreet..my
cousin said..no aunty I'm already fat and need to shed
20 pounds..aunty said..no no. silleee, you must eat
wellll during these days..cousin said...what days?
aunt retorted in a loud whisper that could be heard on
the other side of the globe-arrrey beta main bhi asey
hi sharmatee thi when I waaas paragnaint..(I was as shy as you when I was pregnant)
cousin looked aghast and said..oh my god..I'm not
pregnant-aunty looked aghast and forgot her whispering
and yowled-haain kudiye to tey inni moteee ho
gayi-(girl you HAVE packed on the pounds!)..and then yelled at her family servant..chotu,
jab thak didi yahan hain, inko mithai nahin dena(as long as she is here she doesnt get any sweets!)..poor girl had to get on a diet right then and there..

Weight is a universal preoccupation. The hispanics are not immune, however it can go both ways. As a child I remember my parents very into my weight. As recent immigrants, they just wanted me to blend in, and blending meant losing that budding Cuban butt and hips. I started going to weight watchers at 16. I lost some weight, however one day i gained 2 pounds. The Weight Watchers leader asked me why. Outloud. In front of everyone. "Bananas," I blurted. I had had more bananas that week than the programmed allowed for. Even at that age I thought blaming two extra bananas was ridiculous.

I never went back . . .

Meanwhile, upstairs lived my cousin Cathy. (The entire, recently immigrated family from Cuba lived in Brooklyn. All in one building.) I dont ever remember having met anyone who hated eating more than she did. The entire family thought she was too thin. Another cousin, Maria, was given some magic potion to make her put some weight on. Mind you -- all this and they were all under 10.

My family now are all in Miami. The first generation has a total of 14 cousins, and the second about, i don't know maybe 20. My cousins our as we call them cousin/sisters -- two, maybe three have had gastric bybass and are thin. One, second generation cousin, she was maybe 19, had the surgery.

As for me. I've been on diets all my life. I can tell you that i weighed 112 pounds for five minutes one day. About 20 years ago, some kind of miracle reducing injection was going around the factories and the cuban ladies of Hialeah were lining up and dropping them. My dad suggested I go. Please don't laugh. I did loose some weight. To this day I cringe when I think of what I was injecting. The rumor mill had it pegged as some kind of Cow Urine. Im not kidding. Really. I'm not.

I'm 47 now. I've survived brain surgery. I'm epileptic because of the surgery. Now I just tell people that Im not overweight, but that I have a Cuban body: plenty of butt and hips and a small waist. I'm also just 5 feet tall.

You would think that I would have issues with my boobs, but noone ever took issue with that, and trust me they could have! It was all about the weight, and in hindsight when i look at my pics, i would have grown out of it, if left to nature's own devices.

So the moral of my story: if the people we love tell us there is something wrong with us, we will believe it. As children why shouldn't we?

I'm not advocating obesity. I'm advocating that weight is all relative. And our current culture -- in America, anyways, strongly advocating what looks like anorexia is just as bad as the other extreme. As Mrs. Reagan put it "you can never be too rich or too thin." I think to aspire to either one is disgraceful.

Good Afternoon Chantico . . . kudos for sharing. Wishing everyone healthy bliss . . . and happiness! It isn't all about weight - hugs to all . . .Laila

It’s ironic that health & fitness is only related to exterior looks by majority of the people around us and sometimes by us too. I think being healthy & fit is got more to do how one feels internally first and then the outward appearance.

Weighty Issue otherwise too.

Shrutii.

hahahahahahahahahah!!!!!
so, so true, Rahul.

Bharat - I am one of those relative and I truly am obsessed with your weight....

FYI -- I have also been told that I'm a "Chunky Chopra" (yes, Shekhar, the line came from your play) a "Spicy Samosa" and, on the other end of the spectrum, "Anorexic" for losing my post-pregnancy weight too quickly (not purposely, I might add).

Of course, many people (Indians, of course) like to tell me I've gained or lost weight, depending on how chubby my cheeks happen to be (which often depends on how much water I've had to drink!). Hillarious!

So well written ! When I put on the Freshmen 15, I was too afraid to go back home. It seemed all anyone had to say to me was how "healthy" I've become. And trust me, among gujartis, that's a death knell! My Mom insisted that "good gujju boys" want "slim and trim" girls for marriage-- (I was only 18!)
It was awful.
And when I lost all the excess weight (thankfully) I got compliments like, "ah.. you look so much better now!" .."this is the perfect size."
When I last visited this May and I had lost all the excess weight, a really long distance aunt who I hadn't seen in 4 years commented that I'd put on weight. Unable to resist a retort, I told her, 'yeah well, in the last 4 years you've put on quite a bit as well."

It shut her up.
That shut her up!

Hi Rahul,it is an excellent topic.Personally I feel better,healthier when I weigh what I am supposed to weigh.I have nothing against overweight or underweight people.In USA obesity has become an epidemic.When I went into practice of pediatrics in 1981,I rarely saw morbid obesity.Today I spend hours talking about diet,health,prevention of diabetes and other diseases,because children are obese.
When I visit India,I am told I need to gain weight.I listen and don't pay attention to what their perception is.I notice most of my friends and family are getting overweight as they are getting older.

thanks laila. hugs!

I'm from Turkey and it's the same here.
Since I was born and grew up in the US, it's always been hard for me to deal with, especially since it tends to be that I've gained weight instead of lost it (which physically can't be true, at least not that many times) and usually spoken by women older than me.
Interesting, huh?
I've stopped taking this as a cultural difference and an issue about women asserting their insecurities. Am I being too judgmental?

I'm from Turkey and it's the same here.
Since I was born and grew up in the US, it's always been hard for me to deal with, especially since it tends to be that I've gained weight instead of lost it (which physically can't be true, at least not that many times) and usually spoken by women older than me.
Interesting, huh?
I've stopped taking this as a cultural difference and an issue about women asserting their insecurities. Am I being too judgmental?

" You look fat!" I said to my ex boy friend's Italian mother while she was serving dinner. What I meant was that she put on some weight. Being an Indian, I know that we people comment on weight a lot but all we are trying to say is, " Hey, how are you doing? aka how much you weigh thesedays?"

My mom came back from India yesterday. After hugging me, she looked at me for a second.

It was a mother's stare. My eyeballs were getting ready to be rolled.

"You've gained weight", she said.

I told her I weigh 145 pounds, and I proceded to wave my hands up in the air.

"Look at your cheeks, they are so round".

She was right. I lost.

Dear Rahul ... Very interesting as I learned something new today about your culture and mine. Thanks! Anyway, I opened your post because I put on 10 pounds in the last 2 weeks due to the break up of my 2nd boyfriend in 6 months and I am giving up! ...for a while anyway :D ... I am miserably fat! Oh, I will lose it as soon I regain myself. Love, Char

Hey, the plus in all my weight gain is that I was carded last week (i.e., asked to show my I.D.) when I bought beer so that I could drown myself. ... and I am 46! That woman made my day! :D I had no make-up on, was sick, my hair pulled back/not even brushed, with sweats on as I crawled out of bed to buy pain killers for some major dental surgery I just had done. Well...off to my treadmill, my new boyfriend!

hahaha!!!! Skinny or fat - hmmmmm aunty you can call/tell me whatever you want, cos I aint paying any attention (ofcourse with all due respect)!!! :)

Another the thing is my complexion - "you look darker than I saw you last time" - yes aunty I dont have a problem of being dark, dont see the need to pile on the foundation or powder - this who I am - u like me? great! dont like me? great!!!! :)

Beauty is in the eye of he beholder: dark,fair,skinny,fat - who cares???????????

Rad

as an English ladki who had lost a few pounds (after quitting smoking and putting loads on) I was thrilled to be told by a colleague in India (Orissa)'Medem -you have lost all your health!'

May Rahul never suffer from blogstipation from hereon, btw. It probably plays havoc with your weight ;)

Hi! Rahul...
I began my tryst with blogging by reading your stuff. And frankly speaking, I am pleasantly surprised to find that you have such a fine sense of humour and know how to use it so discreetly to drive home your point. You sure know how to weigh your words...

This is all so true! Every time I have gone to visit India, right after the customary hellos and what-a-long-flight-you-must-have-hads, it's all about the pounds. And when I was younger and had baby fat, it really hurt! "It's out of love," psh! lol

I went to India with a friend and we stayed with her relatives in Gujarat. The first thing all of them did was ask her if she had lost weight, and then after much discussion, it was decided that she just looked smaller next to her "large friend"! :-)

Hi Rahul,
well i have been visiting Pizza Hut since the past three days in a row n hogging desserts!!! And me and my friend derive tremendous pleasure in treating each other with fatty stuffs...the sole aim being so obvious! But it feels good not to care ;-)

LOL Rahul,

You are so funny! It is a pleasure to read your posts. I got introduced to Intentblog in the month of November only and I discovered that you too write here when somebody just posted on your "blessed" thread which is now in the archives. I am still going through your various posts and let me tell you this.....you are so endearing that it seems you are a long lost friend of mine. I must compliment your parents for they must have raised you and Akshaye really well. Maybe it's because of the blessings of Osho on your father that you guys are such fine people.

But you haven't written since your grandma left. Keeping busy these days? It's a pleasure to read what you write.

Cheers!
Navin Bajaj
http://navinsuperstar.blogspot.com/

Rahul,
I've been a fan of yours since "Earth." I once thought I should try to figure out where in New York you lived and ask you out for a drink. Now reading your posts my "crush" has been validated because you're goddamn witty and that implies that a conversation with you would be fun ;-). I wonder why this wit didn't come through on AVS? Being Punjabi myself, I wanted to let you know that your line about feeling like a "reduced" sauce made me laugh out loud at work.
AA

Agree with them wholeheartedly when they say you have become 'healthy'. Tell them you can pass through a door only when you move sideways

If they say you have lost weight, tell them that your parents dont give you anything to eat

But seriously.

This is cool, you have to try it. I guessed 64643, and this game guessed it! See it here - http://www.funbrain.com/guess/

Energy and Asset Technology, Inc and Comments spam

I have been getting spam in my blog Comments from Energy and Asset Technology, Inc.

As a quick Google search of Energy and Asset Technology, Inc. found, this is one of many pages on the Net with press releases from Energy and Asset Technology, Inc and it has a name and address:

Energy and Asset Technology, Inc.
George McMillan
US: 561 620 4949
Australia: 617 5570 4500

as you can see here, they do put out a lot of press releases.

I don't know whether Energy and Asset Technology, Inc. (selling timber products) and George McMillan exist, but if they do it looks like someone is trying to make George McMillan look like an unethical, creepy bastard who deserves to get Telephone spam from friends of blogging. But I doubt it's a real human being.

Then I searched Google on Energy and Asset Technology, Inc spammer

Then I found it's a Pump and Dump scam: "Did you know that all the 'share recommendations' and 'company investments' spams I have received have all been for the Pump & Dump scam, known in the U.K. as 'Share price ramping". It is a scam where the spammer buys cheap shares in a company, hypes up the share price based on spammed e-mails and bulletin board stories. Once the gullible have bought shares and caused the share price to rise, the spammer sells their shares at a profit."

Let's hope someone finds the spammer ... like the FBI.

miss or skip d dessert table??..lolzzzzzzzzzz....dt part ws fab!

miss or skip d dessert table??..lolzzzzzzzzzz....dt part ws fab!

Hi,
I realise this post was written ages ago, but someone sent me the link after i wrote this

http://thebratthebeanandbedlam.wordpress.com/2008/02/07/manners-for-immigrants-tantric-sex/

would you care to share your views on it?

Hi,
I realise this post was written ages ago, but someone sent me the link after i wrote this

http://thebratthebeanandbedlam.wordpress.com/2008/02/07/manners-for-immigrants-tantric-sex/

would you care to share your views on it?

Hey Rahul, I came across to your blog today just flukely, but so far it has been interesting to read 'em! Just wanted to suggest you a correction, you just swapped soemone's gender, although I dont know whether it was m2f or f2m...mmm....confused? Check this blog article's 6th paragraph, through out in that paragraph you have mentioned SHE and HER but in the last line it is "HE"!

I would love to knwo what kind of goof up was it, or a simple spelling mistake? I deserve a reply from you for this buddy!