´when the heck did that happen?´
´where the heck do they go for sex ?´

I frequently ask myself the same,
philosopical question,
for I too missed out on some sweet applepie, while hittin´ da books and da gym,
nevertheless,
therefore,
If it wouldn´t be too much trouble,
I would like to sign up for the next flower power thing, for as I can see on archival footage,
it was one hell of a party!!

Love and good spiritual vibrations,
Ps. Brazile, man, that´s the place to be!!
even Snoop Dogg says..obrigado! (bonita
seniorita´s?)

we could call that sex-mission..
´Follow the Dogg!´

;)

Hi Shekhar, India sure has changed for the worse in some respects.But still the essence of the old India in which I grew up is still there. The big cities are seeing what you are describing more so than rural areas. My brother,sister and mother live in small taluka places. I see some changes there but not as bad as MUMBAI, DELHI or BANGALORE.I love visiting India.I was in Delhi a lot during my last trip,and was amazed by the people on the streets,cars,autos,buses, trucks,bicycles,animals.It is congested!Well there are a billion people in India.Take care Shekhar,God bless.

hummm India ...

must be the party my Indian friend who coincidentely will arrive in New Delli in the same day as me ...from USA

is telling me about ...

is it on teh 1st of November???

people dancing on the streets .. firecrackers (different kinds I would think) ...

difficult to imagine as it is such a unique culture ...

will get my ticket today ... then apply for a visa ...

one month I will be there ...

nervous at some deep level as it feels quite overwhelming...

maybe because it came so unexpectadely and I will be travelling on my own ...

despite being met by an indian man in Bombay (who I never met) at 12 at night .. who will give me the internal tickets which he so kindly bought for us , for half price ...

before going to New Delli...

realized how I need inner stillness as it is getting pretty intense ...

even if I discovered that the meditation I mostly love is through movement .. specifically dancing, where I loose myself in myself and with God ...

I feel streched even if I know that I am swimming in grace ...

How wonderful to have the chopra land with me in India, of all places ....

AIDS unfortunately is a huge dampener on the fun, but free sex is finally here, yeah baby, yeah :). Finally we're getting rid of all those unnecessary hangups and getting back to the kama sutra age where both men and women were known to have multiple partners and no qualms and puritanism about that or the sex act per se. Sticking with one partner from 20 years of age?? People must have been insane!

AIDS unfortunately is a huge dampener on the fun, but free sex is finally here, yeah baby, yeah :). Finally we're getting rid of all those unnecessary hangups and getting back to the kama sutra age where both men and women were known to have multiple partners and no qualms and puritanism about that or the sex act per se.

Sticking with one partner from 20 years of age?? People must have been insane these last few decades!

Statistics is a very funny thing. So is the tendency of all of us to convert a non-issue to an issue. For a sobering effect let me give one figure: only increase of 1 to 4 is a 25% increase. Hence I don’t think we should jump to the conclusion that a revolutionary or a great moral degrading phenomena is occurring. We may need to find out the figures to come to any conclusion. And as any statistician will tell, practically, the maximum percentage of growth happens only at the initial stages. In that sense we also may conclude that the moral degradation or permissibility or whatever we call it, are still in initial stages and not so alarming.
In the lighter side, I also am not able to figure out where do they do? In the crowded cities how they manage?
This remind me of my old experience of may be of early seventies. On the occasion of Gajan Utsab which falls on the last day of Chaitra month I happened to visit one village fare at an Adibasi village somewhere in the border of Orissa, Bihar (Now it should be Jharkhand) and West Bengal, the nearest railway station being Dhalbhumgarh on South Eastern Railways.
Since afternoon hundreds of girls and boys were gathering wearing their best of dresses and jewelry (boys with their weaponry of Bows and Arrows, some of them even with their country made guns). At dusk, the girls started dancing forming a ring around a banyan tree accompanied by music of various instruments. The whole place did not have any lighting. Groups of boys were moving around. Some of them carrying even petromax lights. I was a bit surprised as none of them were hanging the lights anywhere to lighten up the area, they were only looking at the girls with the lights. As the night progressed so the crowd. After a couple of hours I noticed that the crowd was getting thinner but could not reason out why or might not have bothered as I was thoroughly enjoying my first encounter with a Adibasi festival and off course I was a kid of may be 17 or 18. By around 10 or 11 p.m. I was fully exhausted with the fatigue of walking some 20 odd kms to reach the place and fell asleep under the tree. Waking up early morning I found that the crowd have vanished. As I was proceeding to my host’s hut on a village road, guess what I encountered with – couples enjoying themselves here and there behind the bushes or any other place they could find.
Later I was told the local custom is something like this: boys and girls meet on this occasion and choose their partners. They stay together for three days during the festival, enjoy themselves and after 3 days, if they continue to like each other, marry and start their married life.
(I always have a longing to go back there again to find out whether the custom prevails till date or not. But I think, I will never go back again to see that the paradise is lost, Rather, I will keep the wish lingering in my mind and cherish the sweet thought.)
I narrated the story for the prudes to remind that the love and physical relationship between Adam and Eve are going on since the advent of humanity and there is nothing immorality in life as long as we don’t dirty it by calling so.

Sunil, you sound ecstatic! You go, man!

For one who spent quite a lot of my youth in Gujrat, Navratri was my favourite festival and with good reason. More to the point, for the same reason ;)

I've played a major part in hosting the largest Navratri outside India; in Edison NJ. That was 92. And it was one big meat market. The vans of many organisers and vendors were bumping up and down at 4 in the morning. There was as much rhythm in the parking lots as much as inside the tent; About India, I think besides major metros like Bombay-Delhi, the only time girls can officially party all night out is Navratri- so its literally nine nights when the godesses do go crazy... and why not ? our society is so hypocritical that a guy can be out all night but not girls... so let the girls have their moment of freedom

hey bikash, I was not using the statistics as a moral issue ! I am not one to use premarital success a s a benchmark of moral degradation.

I'm for a lot more freedom of choice in your sexual behaviour.

shekhar

sorry i meant preparital sex and not premarital success !!

shekhar

and premarital !! shekhar

I am happy to know that India is breaking away from "cultural traditions" crap. It is a good thing though many will cry saying "western influence has corrupted Indian culture", etc. In my opinion, the potential AIDS danger in India is due to the reluctance of the society to talk about sex freely in the name of culture, traditions, etc. This is a good improvement from the "traditional" old days. I also want India to stop moral policing from politicians, society, family, etc. If they all mind their own business, it will do a lot of good to our society. India should learn to respect the youth and move away from the patriarchal nature of the society.

We also have to get rid of "fundamentalist" religious elements. As long as it is not done, India cannot be an open society. As long as people are getting killed for celebrating valentine's day (or should I use "prostitution day" as called by Hindutva forces), as long as a tennis star could not decide on what dress she can wear, our society is going to have problems. We need to get out of these fundamentalist elements from the society. Being an open society need not be taken as a wrong influence of west. As long as it is a positive influence, there is nothing wrong in adapting to such a form of the society. I don't believe in having a society full of crap in the name of preserving traditions and culture. In my opinion, an advanced society is one which adapts fast by taking the positve aspects from different cultures. If Indian society can take this route, it will be good for the society.

Whoa Sunil, you be careful out there :) Nothing is free, least of all sex. Many a tear is shed in the process. All's well as long as people don't pretend that all's when it sometimes (often) is not.

Bikash - thanks for that slice of village life. It was very interesting.

Just to clarify, by open society I didn't mean anything about the external appearances. In my opinion, a scantly clad woman without abortion rights is no different from a Burkha clad woman with no rights. For me a society is open if religion doesn't dictate how a person should behave.

Dear Sekhar,
I am sorry if my comments gave the feeling that I was criticising you. But I was not. I was trying to expand to the meaning of your comments, which, I believe, meant to commend the newly felt sexual liberalisation.
Let's have a laugh on your comment of diversity of Indian society over an old joke (if I recollect correctly, I read in one writings of the original king of sexual liberalization - Khushwant Singh)
Three ladies, one tamilian, one marathi and one punjabi were brought to the Yamaraja for their hearing after their death.
Yamaraja asked the tamil lady about her deeds in her human life. And the response was, 'I was a perfect wife, daughter, daughter-in-law etc.etc. I was always faithful to my husband, respected my in-laws and spend all my time for the service of my family members.’ ‘O.K. send her to heaven’ ordered the Yama.
On the same question, the marathi lady replied.’ Well I was faithful to my husband, but did not look after my in-laws, and generally looked after my children well.’ ‘O.K. give her one year in hell and then send to heaven’ sentenced Yama.
Then came the Punjabi lady, who confessed,’ I was never faithful to my husband, I did harass my in-laws, and never found enough time for the children.’ ‘Well, send her to my palace’ replied Yama.

Dear Sunil,
Here is one insane person who has stuck with one partner for 20 years and feel quite happy being so.

Hi Bikash,
Love is all you need (quoted from a famous Beatles song :)

and you can experience LOVE anywhere, everywhere, in the streets, and in your heart, and in the smile of another you have known forever, or just met!

this is so romantic! :)

and doesn't 20 years seem to pass so quickly! Yet, Happy remains - even as experiences pass.

Blessings to you and your wife.

Blessings to All!
~~ K

Blessings
Bikash
and to your partner,
and perhaps
I should have said husband
?
Love and Blessings to All!
and smiles,
~~ K

Shekhar, I guess it kills you to come to terms with premarital sex :-) I had a good laugh at your "stuttering" before you got it right. Should ask Mallika and Alex how feasible it is to add a spell-checker with the preview option.

Hey bikash what you said was wonderful..stuck and happy..very interesting...
I'm stuck since last 10 years...and we've made some great progress.Can't wait how life looks like after 20..I don't know if you have seen the movie "Shall we Dance" Susan Sarandon aptly sums marriage ,she says that we all need someone to witness our life...i don't remember the full quote but whatever she said was wonderful.

Yeah, some parts of the movie were great. Here you go Andaleeb:

We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet. I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things - all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying "Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness".

This is even better:

"The rumba is the vertical expression of a horizontal wish. You have to hold her, like the skin on her thigh is your reason for living. Let her go, like your heart's being ripped from your chest. Throw her back, like you're going to have your way with her right here on the dance floor. And then finish, like she's ruined you for life."

Bikash, good for you. I'm too young for that yet though ;). Hope to have that someday too.

Divya, not to worry. "Being born is a fatal condition". And I'm not that promiscuous anyway, only gone all the way with a couple of longterm gf's :).

Thanks...AK i'm gonna print this and put it in my wallet!!!I love this quote...on marriage..there are billion of people what does one life mean...What are we really and who will remember us centuries later!!!!

Great stuff- you are educating me about a side of the world I know little about. More!

Ooh, I think I'll just write that out too(no printer) and tuck that in a safe place, AK; loved it.

AS far as free sex? What is so liberating about communicable diseases; that spawned TO: Aides?

men must stop thinking with desire and more with the Spirit. Free-Sex(fleshing as called here in the north)is a huge price to pay for ego-deception and very pagan; an attachment.

North

well actually, being as we ARE ummmm mammals; ti's hard to disconnect from that, too, isn't it?

boy, we human beings are complicated!

North

North: Who says free sex cannot also be an exhilarating joining of two people in love? It need not be about conquest, possession or lifelong, but could be about a simple event of love. Enjoy every feeling your body gives you, minus attachment to it.

About communicable diseases, I hear you completely.

hello, Sunil : ) Ooh, absolutely nothing wrong with affection at all, at all! However, I can see how free sex, can actually "cause" the distinction of the human race, through communicable diseases; on TOP of environmental impacts in global society.

I am just a firm believer, that mingling of multi-body-fluids, through multi-sex-partners, increases the risk of disease dramaticly! why chance it? I don't see the alure.

IS not hollywood, as we speak, plagued with communicable disease? I see NO love there, no passion; other than obsession with flesh-desires?

Seems to me, man's "desires" put him/her at risk; so ultimately the control of desire must be engaged with foresight.

for myself; I have to feel a certain degree of love for a man, to bed with him; it's not old-religion conditioning either as most would prefer to imply; as such, I am a practicing celibate for 7 years now. that in itself, targets me for ridule and constant moral debate(sigh)

I am

North

Hi,
For all the reservations that India has had with reference to sex, it has the biggest population - a known fact, you'd say? I agree. Here's something very interesting that happened. Someone in my company went to the US for the first time from India. He was having breakfast with a couple of Americans and exclaimed, "Wow, where are all the people?". He felt that the streets looked empty. Now the American guy who was also his colleague felt that the comment was rather strange...till his trip to India, 6 months later. And during his farewell speech, he commented - " I didnt understand so & so's comment then as to where all the people were, during his visit to the US, till I came here. And now I ask you all, as I look at the streets -WHERE ARE SO MANY PEOPLE COMING FROM???" ...:)..

thnks!

dear sunil,
how can u possibly think of sex without the feeling of love??
and i have been married for 12 years but i have never felt an urge to experience it with someone else except my partner !!
ya sure the people back had no idea of morality ...the times you are talking about are the times when there was no difference between humans and animals,they used to eat raw meat slept in the caves and behaved more or less alike .
in this age ,when we call ourselves civilized, is this a rational behaviour?

Hi Sabrina,
i do have a question for your comment on sunil, whats the meaning of love, i am still in search for the proper definition, and not satisfied with the answers received, and how & why isn't it possible to have sex without the feeling of love, and who says we are still civilized, thats why we are going to be ahead of all when it comes to population count.and the difference that you have mentioned between humans and animals in earlier, which still do exists in our loving india till this day, and also in other developing asian countries, we try to imitate the west, when it comes to clothes, and living style, so we can't call ourselves civilized as yet.........

hi victor,
yes you have a true question here but then this can be the case with anything in life...contradictions are always there as it is said that there are always two sides to a coin.
now as you have asked victor,true love is a kind of love that is selfless and is never ending..this i think is the simplest definition of love ...a feeling where you stop thinking of yourself and think about giving the other person the rest of your life's priorities...i think that is true love...however i can paint this site with words in description of true love but i believe that would be a waste of time and energy as this explains the very essence of it.
now about our being civilized, i must say we are far behind our counterparts but then who says they define civilization???
we have a very rich culture of our own and we dont need to copy or imitate them in any ways rather we should develop our own ways.
this is indeed our fault to copy the west in clothes and living style,however we could have developed a better style had we wanted to...
but...
the question here is that if thomas alva ddison invented light bulb,then what is the use of reinventing it the indian way???
look victor,we all live in this world and due to this are bound to share things...but that doesn't mean we cannot do things our way..its just that if some one has already done something then whats the point in wasting our time and money in reinventing it..,wearing jeans is soo very comfortable...its an american tribal wear actually...texans or the cowboys used to and still do wear jeans but because of its no fuss wearability its worn all over the world with equal interest.
regarding the population count, i wont say anything as it is increasing day by day and that is a major problem of coming times.
and here i was talking about my own feelings for love and sex...i said i cant think of one without the other...i never said it should be the case with everyone.
god bless.

hey guys,

i am from canada. i stumbbled upon ur blog. anyhow, i've seen the results of the so-called "sexual liberation" in canada. there are so much problems here that it is not funny. i pity indians who believe in that liberation crap. i don't care anymore if i sound traditional, but if you've seen what i've seen, then you'll appreciate our traditional indian culture tenfold.

hello everyone,
Personally I don't agree with the prospect of promiscuous 'primarily for pleasure' sex, or 'free sex', 'pornography' or 'prostitution'. But in terms of things where there is a loving heartfelt relationship between two individuals, and they want to express their love to each other sexually as well - and be that before marriage. Such things should be less 'quarantined'. I'm not against the 'traditional opinion' entirely, but I don't like its restrictiveness. Promiscuity is wrong, but so is unnecessary restriction. Responsibility, forethought and choice need to be preached.
- opinions please?