100 Questions From My Child
Mallika Chopra - April 19, 2007
Intentbloggers,
I am excited to formally announce the publication of my second book, 100 Questions From My Child
my first book, 100 Promises To My Baby
Anyways, following is an article I have written about 100 Questions From My Child
Love Mallika
100 Questions From My Child
by Mallika Chopra
Forward by Deepak Chopra
I grew up surrounded by people who were on a journey of self-discovery. As my father, Deepak Chopra, is a well-known author and speaker in the self-help space, I have been to numerous seminars and interacted with people who are going through some momentous transition in their lives. Generally, these people are going through a life-changing moment - such as a recent diagnosis of a disease or a divorce -- that have challenged them to think about who they are and where they fit in their community or the world.
Despite growing up in this environment, I have to admit that I was never fully aware of myself - my driving needs, my insecurities, my core beliefs. It was when I became pregnant that a need to really discover who I am became more compelling. Knowing that as a mother, I was going to be responsible for nurturing a new, vulnerable, pure life was an overwhelming sense of responsibility. My actions, my thoughts, my passions, my insecurities, my beliefs would be the impressions that shaped the life of my child. I was going to be responsible for nurturing the mind, body and soul of another human being.
One of the most interesting, fun and challenging aspects of the parenting journey for me has been the process of answering my children's questions. Even before they could speak, my children began asking questions - questions about how to interact with the world, about what was safe, what was good or bad in their world. And it was my reaction to these questions that began to shape their worldview, their sense of security and trust.
And, of course, as Tara, my elder daughter, became more vocal, she was actually able to put her questions into words, unleashing an unending hunger for information, explanations, justifications, and confirmations. Question after question after question!
There were the questions about behavior - Why do I have to share? Why do I have to say thank you? Why do I have to forgive my sister? - that set the foundation for their choices and values.
There were questions related to the body and the earth - Why don't my princess shoes fit me anymore? Why don't girls have tails like boy do? Do trees have feelings? Where do snowmen go? - that provided an opportunity to stir the imagination with fairytales and science.
There were the questions that created an opportunity to search, imagine and inspire - Do I have to color inside the lines? How can I help others? How did you choose me as your baby?
And, there were many difficult questions -- Where is Maa (my grandmother who died)? Mommy, what's a bomb? If God is always watching, why do bad things happen do good people? -- that created a need in me to make sure I was responding to them in a conscious, heartfelt manner.
I realized that answering these deeper questions required my own soul searching. For there were many questions I really did not know how to answer. They were questions that made me think about what I believed in and how I perceived my world. And I felt a sense of responsibility to give thoughtful answers that fostered love, confidence, and contemplation. There were also many times when I had to admit to my daughters that I really did not know how to answer a question, and that it was okay to not know.
As their mother, I was creating a context for them to ask and answer questions, setting the framework for how they would approach situations, challenges, and experiences for the rest of their lives. I realized that many times my daughters came up with the answers to questions, sometimes the most difficult ones, by themselves. In fact, their answers were often much more profound than anything I could ever think of.
As I watched them discover the world and find their answers, I was often amazed at their inherent wisdom, connection, and clarity. As I continue my parenting journey, I realize that my daughters are truly also my teachers. Through our conversations, our struggles, and our laughter, I continue to learn and search and question day after day. I will forever be grateful to both of them for challenging me to continually seek and grow and love.
100 Questions From My Child
In the foreword of the book, my father writes:
For a parent, nothing is more important then encouraging your children to ask as many questions as possible and in turn to also to participate in the questioning of everything we take for granted. At the deepest level of our being our soul has a knowingness of all that exists. The knowingness that results with intimacy of our soul results in spontaneous right action: the ability to make the most evolutionary choice in every situation that happens. But the soul must be nurtured through questioning. Who am I? What are my deepest desires? What is my purpose in life? What is the contribution I wish to make to the world? These are questions that shape the meanings and context of our life as we go from childhood to maturity.
My hope is that even when I can't answer all of my daughter's questions, I can cultivate in them a sense of self-discovery, a willingness to be open, and a desire to keep asking more questions.
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Posted by Mallika Chopra at April 19, 2007 06:44 AM
Comments
1. Posted by
Parmjit Singh
![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.intentblog.com/nav-commenters.gif)
on
April 19, 2007 08:33 AM
That was really lovely to read, Mallika. I read your recent post on the mommy-author life you're leading, and it had a refreshing innocence and lack of pretence about it - the same qualities we find most appealing in children. And what your father says in the foreword you posted really resonates with me. Our children can lead us into a most exciting journey of discovery and of rediscovering our innocence.
2. Posted by
sWORDSman
on
April 19, 2007 08:57 AM
Congratulations Mallika, I am sure you have imparted a lot and will continue to do so in your interactions with your self.
Perhaps you find something below to further impart.
The way these galactic penal colonies work is that everyone gets out of prison at the same time. Actually we don't get out we transform our reality from a prison to paradise.
Living the truth in a world of fiction is difficult.
~Infinite Play the Movie
However as more people discard their fictions it will get easier, so there is incentive to help others see through their fictions.
I have developed a new fiction eraser that can be used liberally in your daily story creation.
It is to help us live the truth and get over the fear or doubt hurdle in each instance where we feel tempted to subscribe to a fiction, it is a replacement for prayer, this ritual itself being somewhat encumbered by fictions yet still producing some good results because a glint of it’s original forgotten purpose remains.
Put your attention on the DIVINE CONCEPT for several moments.
That is it, you don't need to ask for anything, the universe already knows what you this act need will keep you on the path to fulfill divine intention and reap prosperity and abundance for all without creating turbulence.
When you place your attention on the Divine Concept it erases the fictions and empowers and imparts intelligence and wisdom.
The following shall become common dialog amongst us.
"That's a fiction man"
When we spend time periodically focusing on the divine concept we will have the ability to see through the worlds fictions.
If you don't know what the Divine Concept is, you’re pretending not to know. Quit pretending that is what allows you to subscribe to fictions.
So for the rest of today and forever, when you hear someone state a fiction, call them on it and supply a truth.
Take a few moments now and focus on the Divine Concept.
All One being, both noun and verb, loving, compassionate, all powerful.
It's not really a moral obligation to be good; you’re free to suffer as long as you want. :)
3. Posted by
Richard Thomas
on
April 19, 2007 09:00 AM
There is no battle between good and evil in the universe. It is a battle between choosing truth or fiction in each individual mind.
~Infinite Play the Movie
And I stood before the throne at the end of the day, and a voice permeated my head space.
"Did you live the truth today or did you support the world’s fictions?"
Evil is a fiction born of fiction.
The truth is I am and so are you, separate we are not, as one I AM and everyone. Knowing our truth I Love All.
4. Posted by
Richard Thomas
on
April 19, 2007 10:08 AM
Mallika, you are truly beautiful and authentic, you have my respect and admiration!
Thank you for writing about such important things from your big heart, and for helping the UNICEF and Anouradha's Project Why. I wish you continued success on your inner and outer journey!
5. Posted by
Aurora C
on
April 19, 2007 10:44 AM
Hello Mallika and Everyone,
How exciting to present your book! Wishing you much success.
ruth
6. Posted by
ruth
on
April 19, 2007 11:19 AM
well, got myself a copy, of ageless body, timeless mind, in print today, I was pretty amazed at that third chapter, something about, the wisdom of uncertainty, brilliant stuff!
anyhow my diary,
I'm gonna put your new book on my to-read list mallika, but my dillema for today was, should I read, that feng shui/vastu on a website, book first or saira's how to catch a princess and keep her..;)
With Love, Passion,
marek
7. Posted by
marek dariusz podsiadlo
on
April 19, 2007 03:16 PM
Windows Vista for dummies first, definatly, gotta learn a new language..(love to give those ict guys a lecture!) but than again those appple guys, weren't they smarter.. mhmmn.. reflections
of a polish,
love, passion,
marek
8. Posted by
marek dariusz podsiadlo
on
April 19, 2007 03:39 PM
well, let's be.. I saw, I thought.. and I..
loved. that's my conclusion.
So hadda made some new businesscards,(just for the girls..;)hooked up this, internet, (or do you idian people call, it in 2007 akasic;)
something about 10 euro's for 500 biznezz cards,
and another 10, for shipping costs, for my Dariusz Consultancy, new venture, 'small Polish businesses, in the Netherlands, Fung Shui, and..
;) a surprise', I was thinking about registering,
buzka,
marek
9. Posted by
marek dariusz podsiadlo
on
April 19, 2007 03:55 PM
I thought i was e @ desperate..;)
than I read this.. hey you idian people are not, very much unlike polish..
from,
http://www.shaadi.com/
:)
read this, i'm gonna caal her a princess..
My Personality, Long-Term Goals, Partner Expectations, etc
This sections stumps me. Never thought I would be doing this. It kills me to write something like this in a state of desperation. Smile. Personality? errr.. ummm. You'd better ask my friends that. And I have a lot of them, and am sure, they would all come up with different answers. Don't be scared I don't have that split personality thingy (tho I have done quite a few different things such as I did my Masters in ENglish from Jadavpur University in Calcutta, did a post grad dilpoma in journalism from the indian institute of mass communication, worked as a reporter with the statesman and telegraph in cal for about three years before jumping gun and joining the strange world of IT. Currently working as some kind of a branding and business content manager with a leading IT MNC in Mumbai. Meanwhile I have also completed my M. Phil in Women's Studies from Jadavpur University in 2006.. phew). Its just that I love having people around me, not necessarily to chat them up or have fun, but also to just observe them and maybe wonder what they will do the next moment or what they have jsut come from.... one reason I enjoy travelling in public transports. Long-term goals? well, never thought very clearly, but I guess to say I want to be happy can safe qualify as a fairly long term plan. Partner expectations. Aha. Maybe will be able to figre that out once I know who I exactly am, and thereby decide who might gel well with me. Not necessarily that we would have to have the same interests in life (mine are 1. reading ayn rand, richard bach, pgwodehouse, gerald durrell, sukumar ray, sunil chattopadhyay, humayun ahmed, nabanita debsen, rabindranath thakur's poetry, and in times of emergency am game to try any book I can lay my hands on, 2. music: I play the spanish guitar a wee bit and love singing, tho can't say whether I have had many willing listeners other than the bathroom plumbing... love listening to country music, the beatles, Def Leppard, Duran Duran, The Eagles, MJ (don't run away yet!), bangla band numbers esp mohiner ghoraguli, and rabindra sangeet sung by anyone without any mannerism, 3. Helpung out at NGOs:Have been working at Mother Teresa's orphanage all my adult life, and also at red light areas and slums for an NGO which I officially help to run. But actually just have fun with the kids, cuddling them, teaching them basics of language and math, music, and painting. 4. Gorging on movies: I watch 4 movies on an average a week, most of which I borrow from the British Council Library or simply buy the cheap pirated Hollywood trash. But I love them all. ) Well so where were we? Aaah. My expectations. My theory, if you would care to listen. Do not expect. U get less hurt. Anyway, a few basics, he has to support himself financially, as I dont have enough money to feed another mouth. Smile. A good sense of humour thrown in would help along with a mind that is free and allows others around it to be the same.
10. Posted by
marek dariusz podsiadlo
on
April 19, 2007 05:46 PM
She's too cute not to be..
mentioned a, single, @ 27, How the crap!?!
did she m(a)snsged to be online.. on a matrimimional site.. were she was from..,
MEGA cute! sue me @ The Hague, for
her, ..cuteness.. they are too stubborn.. for their..
love, women, buzka, marek
11. Posted by
marek dariusz podsiadlo
on
April 19, 2007 06:01 PM
I believe this poem is apt to celebrate the release of the book.
Childhood
Childhood, sweet and sunny childhood,
With its careless, thoughtless air,
Like the verdant, tangled wildwood,
Wants the training hand of care.
See it springing all around us --
Glad to know, and quick to learn;
Asking questions that confound us;
Teaching lessons in its turn.
Who loves not its joyous revel,
Leaping lightly on the lawn,
Up the knoll, along the level,
Free and graceful as a fawn?
Let it revel; it is nature
Giving to the little dears
Strength of limb, and healthful features,
For the toil of coming years.
He who checks a child with terror,
Stops its play, and stills its song,
Not alone commits an error,
But a great and moral wrong.
Give it play, and never fear it --
Active life is no defect;
Never, never break its spirit --
Curb it only to direct.
Would you dam the flowing river,
Thinking it would cease to flow?
Onward it must go forever --
Better teach it where to go.
Childhood is a fountain welling,
Trace its channel in the sand,
And its currents, spreading, swelling,
Will revive the withered land.
Childhood is the vernal season;
Trim and train the tender shoot;
Love is to the coming reason,
As the blossom to the fruit.
Tender twigs are bent and folded --
Art to nature beauty lends;
Childhood easily is moulded;
Manhood breaks, but seldom bends.
David Bates (1809-1870)
http://rpo.library.utoronto.ca/poem/131.html
Beautiful. You always write so strongly from the heart when you post about your connection and relating to your children.
Coincidentally (synchronistically?) I just came over here from HuffPo where I found this poignant post about motherhood:
Shari Foos: On Becoming a Mother
www.huffingtonpost.com/shari-foos/on-becoming-and-being-a-m_b_46292.html
Blessings - Moms are the greatest! We don't even realize it until we ourselves reach the age where we begin to see our parents within ourselves.
13. Posted by
yogi-one
on
April 20, 2007 09:20 AM
Hi Mallika,
Scott and I happened to hear you this morning on 107.1 radio program. You sounded great. Good luck to you with your book.
Love, Kristin
15. Posted by
Kristin Masterton
on
April 24, 2007 09:15 AM
Dear Mallika,
I congratulate you on your new book on small children “100 Questions from my child”, which I find very inspiring. I wish I had the book when my own children were small.
I have two grandsons of 2 and 4 years and as you can imagine I would very much like their parents to read the book, which I have given to them. The problem is that they haven’t got the time to read it. My son is a director in my former international company, and furthermore, he is also a most wonderful father for his small sons. My daughter in law is helping him in the company and at the same time taking care of the children, the housekeeping and everything. So THEY DON’T HAVE THE TIME to read the book!
Why do I write this to you? Because I think you should read your book into a CD in order to give busy parents all over the world the chance to hear the CD during the few moments the have alone for instance when driving in their car.
For your information, I have been a student with your father at the Chopra Center for many years and I am a teacher in Primordial Sound Meditation and yoga from the Chopra Center.
I hope you can use my advice and look forward to hearing your CD when – hopefully – it will be released within the next future.
Warmest regards
Jet
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Recent Comments
-
Jet commented on 100 Questions From My Child
Dear Mallika,
I congratulate you on you
-
Kristin Masterton commented on 100 Questions From My Child
Hi Mallika,
Scott and I happened to hea
-
TechD commented on 100 Questions From My Child
congratulations on the new book
-
yogi-one commented on 100 Questions From My Child
Beautiful. You always write so strongly from th
-
Jeff commented on 100 Questions From My Child
I believe this poem is apt to celebrate the rel
Congratulations and all the best for the book, Mallika.
I wish you all the success. It would be interesting to read and possibily review your book in context of my personal experience with my own 3 year old daughter, Renelle. If I got the book or the publisher sent us the review copy, we will try to review it and put it on our magazine Healing Matrix [http://www.HealingMatrix.ca], published monthly.
With best, Parmjit Singh, PhD