Some offers are 'great'. They will do everything short of send you to the moon - the money, the perks, the designation, the status. It's a dream place to live. It completes the picture of what you should be socially. But so few people stop to think about whether its what they want. It's the different between what you should want and what you actually do. Very few of us are aware of that difference.

The reason for that is equations. We equate things in life - money and perks vs the comfort of leaning into a friend's lunchbox and picking out a morsel his wife has made 'just the right way'. We equate designation with reach - the ability to network with a number of people because of the boost that a designation gives you. Put that against the warmth of familiarity, the friendliness of knowing a road, a street a building, the way things are done and how things go.

Ive recently walked back into a building where I ran into a peon whose daughter graduated from engineering college when I was here last 7 years ago. Today she works for ICICI bank, his son for DSP Merryl Lynch and he's still a humble peon living in a chawl building. Talking to him, my eyes filled with tears and I thanked god for a chance to be around people whose lives are simple enough and open enough for you to share in.

Sure all decisions aren't practical decisions. You could always use more money, better digs, move to a better way of shopping, upgrade to a better circuit. But that's it, you could always use all those and keep searching and never find it. And emotional decisions don't always work for your immediate good. But I find them hardier in the long haul.

What did the agony uncle in this instance tell his querrant? Don't go. Don't go because you've got it right. California may be a great place to many and most. And you may think tht you haven't got it right if you don't see those benefits others see. But if it doesn't make you comfortable, happy, safe, secure, all the money in the world is not worth it, don't do it. sure it may be a lost opportunity.

But hey, opportunities aren't all they're made out to be...!

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